The Great Camp Out.

Aaah....camping in the great outdoors. Relaxing the by campfire, lounging on the beach, enjoying the peace and quiet of nature....(insert jarring record scratch nice here..)

Took the kids camping on the weekend. We - just the two kids and I - joined my brother and his family for a nice weekend away from the city. We went once last year and it's a good getaway for us during the summer,especially since Eric is so busy with his band (which is playing every single weekend, and then some). Since my brother and his family are borderline professional campers, all we really need to bring is our own sleeping gear, some food and drink and away we go...

Which brings me to my first mistake. I couldn't decide if we should leave after work on Friday or wait until Saturday morning. But it was supposed to be a nice weekend and, in the end, I figured that if I left Friday night we would have at least one full day to enjoy the campground.

I managed to get out of work early (a minor miracle in itself) and took the train home. A few weeks ago, the car had been in the garage to fix a crazy squealing noise, and it had come out of the shop had almost immediately began to make a rattling, knocking noise. So Friday, when Eric was finally in town for a full day, he had returned it to the garage where they said, apparently, the entire exhaust system was holding on by the merest of threads (or whatever holds cars together these days, which probably/hopefully isn't thread, but what would I know?) Since both Eric and I were out of town and the car was undriveable we had to wait until after 5 pm to pick it up and we still had to pack and pick up some groceries.

Anyway, we didn't leave our driveway until after 7pm (mistake 2)and the campground, according to Google Maps was 2 hours and 17 minutes away. Off we go...all is well. About halfway there, I missed a turn off - mistake 3- but didn't want to turn around which meant my step-by-step directions were useless. I resorted to using my usually excellent inner GPS to navigate our way there on my own. Normally, this wouldn't phase me in the slightest, but it was getting dark and I wasn't so concerned about getting lost as I was wasting time and precious daylight hours. I did have an actual GPS system which I flicked on a couple of times, but since the campground didn't have a street number or address it was pretty much useless. I typed in the "region" but then quickly realized that it was going to lead me horrendously astray if I listened to it. (And besides, every time the voice would say "turn left" and I didn't, Kieran would get distressed..he does not trust his mother over the robotic voice of the machine).

Anyway, my own inner navigating probably cost only me 10 minutes, and we finally arrived at around 9:30. the sun is just setting so I'm pretty pleased that I made it before it got really dark. My sister-in-law had called to check our ETA just as we got to the gate. I was talking to the gate guard when she called and I asked her what site they were at, and she said 21. I got our parking permit, verified where site 21 was and off we went. Got to site 21...and it wasn't them (mistake 4). It was getting really dark and the campgrounds roads are narrow and cars are mostly unwelcome - especially as people where heading to "comfort station" in droves with toddlers and toothbrushes in hand. I called and called my brother's cell. No answer. Drove around for about 20 minutes before I headed back to the gate...which was closed for night. No cars. Locked up tight, which I didn't realize until after I had unloaded both kids from the car and actually walked up to the shuttered door. Argh. More distress from Kieran who is convinced that we are lost and is now scared. Finally, my sister in law calls and turns out its site 421. (Never would have found them in a million years...thank God for cell phones).

Finally, we get there.

Now, at this point I should point out that as kids we camped a fair bit...but this was mainly in the north and pre-global warming. At the night the campfire was warm and we put on sweatshirts and sweatpants, covered ourselves in bug spray and toasted marshmallows until we crawled - still fully dressed - into our sleeping bags.

Not this time.

Get unloaded and eat some hot dogs on the campfire. It's very humid, so the campfire is mainly for show. Definitely no "cozying up" to it. Shortly, both kids say they want to go to bed, so off to the tent we go (my brother and his wife had already put up the tent for us. God Bless Them.) Unfortunately, the tent is very hot. I had brought the kids flannel jammies (mistake number 5) and there is no way they can wear them, so they just lay on top of the sleeping bags in their shorts and T-shirts. Argh...I had forgot pillows (mistake number 6). It takes awhile for them to settle down. Kieran would have been fine except he deals very poorly with the heat (he is too hot even when the AC is blasting) so it took him some writhing and whining before he finally rested his sweat-drenched head on my arm and crashed. Kaya....not so lucky. She roamed around the tent - the novelty was too much for her to handle - for what I'm sure was an hour wide awake and chatty, before my brother finally suggested that I put her in the car and drive around.

So, here it is, midnight and I'm driving around the campground - again. (At least this time 95 percent of the people were asleep). I finally I get back to the campsite, have a much needed beer and go to bed. Luckily neither child wakes up through the night. (A particular worry beforehand was Kaya's not frequent - but brutal - nighttime screaming fits which happen periodically and can only ever be solved by either time or, sometimes, Dora The Explorer.)

The next morning they were up predictably early, so we had breakfast and headed right to the beach. Beautiful beach/campground by the way, on Lake Erie, sandy and shallow, fantastic for kids. The waves were quite large, which Kieran and his cousins loved, but Kieran is smaller than the other two and easily knocked over by the waves, so he couldn't venture into the water alone. Kaya, on the other hand, was petrified by the waves and refused to stay on the beach and play unless I was right beside her. (Neither her aunt or uncle would suffice in this case).

After lunch, both kids were tired and since it was very hot at the campsite I decided that I would put them back in the car where they could have quick sleep and I could head out in search of pillows (honestly, it's hard enough sleeping on a rock hard "sleeping mat" in an sweltering, airless tent with two small restless children but to do so without a pillow was too much to bear). I actually drove farther than anticipated, but "pillow stores" are not normally close to Provincial Parks and besides, the kids were sleeping so soundly that I didn't mind.

Got back to the campsite...more beach (the waves were gigantic by now), dinner, playground etc. Fast-forward to the night. Bedtime started a bit earlier, but again, the tent was hot and after about 20 minutes of trying to get both kids settled I decided to cut my losses and packed them both in the van again and travelled my now well-known route around the park. I'm sure the other campers are wondering what the hell that black minivan was doing driving around all-the-freakin-time. I admit, it did feel like cheating. Perhaps to be true to the rustic, outdoor experience, I should have just waited it out and they would have both crashed eventually but, for my own sanity, I needed a break. I don't think I had un-interrupted period of more than 5 minutes to do a single thing for myself since we arrived and at that point all I wanted was to have a quiet drink in front of the fire with the kids needing me. Anyway, again, the van knocked them out and I moved them into the tent. Ah beer here I come...

30 minutes later. mid-sip....Kaya starts to cry out and I freeze in fear. My daughter wakes up at night in one of two ways. She either wakes up and calls out, plays around and falls back asleep. Or she wakes up and screams bloody murder. I knew right away that it was the latter. She's not actually awake so there no appealing to her two-year-old "rational" self. She doesn't want mommy or daddy, a cuddle, a song, a book, a drink, a snack, a toy. Nothing. So, since the decibel of the cry was definitely campground-shaking, back into the god-damn van we went. Again. Black van on the go.

But that was that. She was back out almost immediately and then we went through the night without any problems. Well, at least for them. The temperature finally dropped and I actually got got enough to need my sleeping bag. I was petrified that one or both of them would wake up from the cold. Neither of them was under any blanket and there was no chance I was going to accidentally wake them up by trying to stuff them inside their bags in the pitch dark, but they didn't move. I'm sure the entire campground was grateful.

Anyway, at least the days were quite lovely. The next day we spent more time at the beach. The wind had died down so it was easier for the kids to play in the water without having to hold onto them, and Kaya finally got the hang of digging holes and trying to bury herself in them, so fun was had by all in the end. Well, by most of us. I'm still looking for that un-interrupted relaxation by the fire...