Lance Armstrong is planning a comeback to racing. Please. Can't anyone stay retired any more? Next thing you know my Dad will come out of retirement to go back to teaching. It's all so predictable. Besides, what does he (Lance, not my dad) want to prove? That he's found yet some new way to escape steroid detection? Call me cynical and jaded. Call me irresponsible, but I for one do not believe that man won 6 (or was it 7) Tours de France (Tour de Frances?) completely clean. Can't he just stick to dating starlets?
The baby slept for 12 hours solid last night. Seven-thirty to seven-thirty and not a single peep in between. I fully expect three wise men show up at our door bearing gifts for the new messiah. Which will be nice...I'll finally find out what the hell myrrh is.
Eric bought a couple of Scratch and Win tickets the other night. My ticket (boringly) consisted of scratching four symbols and then winning the corresponding prize at the end of the line. On my second line I won $50. Whoo Hoo! Then I won $5... whoo hoo. Then I won $20....then I read the rules. Apparently I needed to have 4 matching symbols, not three like I thought. I continued to scratch the ticket and by their rules I won nothing. By MY rules I won $100,175.
We went last week to update our Health Cards. Since Eric had to replace his anyway (his wallet still MIA) and since mine is one of the old, raggedy Red and White jobbies, we all went. It was the usual rush of getting two kids out the door for an undetermined length of time, so I was a bit frazzled when we finally hit the road. We finally got to the right place and had just settled in waiting for our number to be called.
Me: "Thank God we don't have to get our picture taken. I totally forgot to brush my hair."
Awkward Pause as I look around the room and see cameras flashing all over the place.
Me: "Ohhhhh."
Eric: "How did you not know this?"
Me: "The kids cards don't have pictures..."
Eric: "You're an idiot."
An idiot, with frizzy unbrushed hair and an official document to prove it.
We went to watch Eric's playoff baseball game on Sunday night. I was not-so-secretly-hoping his team would lose, so he would have Sunday night's free again. Watching baseball with babies is scary. I kept having visions of foul balls smashing into soft baby skulls. (See? Scary thought, right?) We didn't stay long. And they lost, so our work was done anyway.
I'm waiting anxiously for the Fall TV season to start. I actually watched The Hills for the first time ever last week. Is that show supposed to be real? I'm not sure what the hell is going on, but everyone on it is a complete tool. I followed that up with a little 90210 which is Lance Jonesing itself back onto our lives. It's the same stupid show as 15 years ago, only this time there's a black kid. Yawn.
2 comments:
hehehe... I liked this one Gen.. nice.. I wish YOUR RULES did apply to the scratch card.. $100,000 would have been cool..
you did look "HOT" for the health card.. best hair do EVER...
and uhm yes we lost in the playoffs.. but I DID get a home run.. jeez.. leave out all the good info... oh wait you weren't there.. nevermind.
Gee, Gen, I think you ARE becoming cynical and jaded! FIRST you think Sarah Palin's baby is really her daughter's, and NOW Lance has used steroids?? Why Jezebel, I think you'd make a fine American with that attitude! Thanks for the reading enjoyment - keep up the good work.
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